hi again

bonus dave update

i just found this

this is how i used to write when i was upset

sometimes still do

just found it in stuff while cleaning off my computer

NERDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

shut up

ok

*****

It's 5:20 in Oakland, at home, but here I'm cold and hot at once, and feeling much more exhausted than when I left. It's late, and dark. Walk along the waves with me, watch the water glow and gleam, we'll rub sand in each other's eyes accidentally and wind up with unexplainable bruises. I'll be your advocate and your alibi and we'll waste the world together like selfish, dumb, awkward Americans. I'll bite everything before the commercial break. Make your frustration into a physical activity, knit, garden, do laundry. Make your accomplished self-satisfaction into a vice, overindulge, scream and screech it from crystal chandeliers while you spit expensive champagne and fuck stuffed endangered species.

Our sleep will be silent and still. Hold me from behind, roll those fingers through the butter and lint of my skin. Our children will have acne, our daughters will be loose. We grin as I roll a condom on, and exhale in notes, become skyscrapers, et cetera, et cetera. Your beauty is a sunset, a glowing wave, a flower, in bloom, a pillow, a sheet, a lying dog, let it be. I'll never be the officer reporting something pure.

If you think it's cryptic than read every fourth word.
It'll come out at the end just as absurd.

ha ha ha

a little insight into dave

frankly i like it more when i write like that

as opposed to typing up a whiny dave update

btw the line breaks should be way different but DIY BITCHES

sorry

didn't mean to use the b-word

my bad

this has been a b-onus dave update

hey there

wow

this is the longest i've gone without a dave update

i mean, not counting the time before i wrote dave updates

i hate to admit it but this one is gonna be brief too

yesterday i took the day off and went to the beach

i didn't know it was a "clothing-optional" beach

but that made it a lot more entertaining actually

plus it's hard to be self-conscious when there's a big ol fat naked dude on the beach

before we left i ran into the ocean naked, just to try it

it was great

dear readers

i recommend swimming in the ocean naked

i honestly didn't think it would be that cool but it felt great

i mean i don't know how to explain it without sounding like, mystical or whatever

but it just felt unreal

i don't know

i love the ocean

i'll talk more someday soon

this has been the dave update