hi there

i'm dave

i had an idea the other day

i want to start a chili company

called "abe's hearty chili"

gap has a new ad campaign

and the stupid slogan

(at least on one of their bus ads)

is

"BE
ART
BE
HEART"

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

other than

"WE'RE
NOT
EVEN
TRYING"

"MY
KID
SAYS
THE
DARNDEST
THINGS
AND
I
SELL
THEM
TO
COMPANIES
TOO
STUPID
TO
COME
UP
WITH
ANYTHING
ON
THEIR
OWN"

SO

oops

so!

i want to start tagging all their ads

so they say

"BE
fART
aBE's
HEARTy
chili"

i'm gonna make a million dollars

don't try to steal it

it's my idea

the dave update is proof

be art

be the dave update

i have zero e-mails in my inbox

please write me a letter

so that i have little people i can remember

during my meteoric rise

to the top of the chili industry

i do make good chili, no joke

ok

bye

this has been the dave update