hi guys

so

listen

i'm quitting this whole pope thing

andy just told me that i guess there's a black guy in the running???

i don't know who's gonna vote for me instead of a black guy

so i'm withdrawing from the race

good luck black guy

BLACK!

POPE!

BLACK!

POPE!

this has been a dave endorsement

HI GUYS

the pope is retiring

people are wondering who the next pope should be

my thoughts?

give me the job

here are my qualifications

- i'm not 100000000 years old

finally the church can cut back on their holy adult diaper budget!

- went to a catholic high school

so i know that going to a catholic high school fuckin' SUCKS

AND

i have some great ideas on how to fix that!

idea #1

how 'bout we cool it on all this god stuff???

BOoooooo-RINGggggggggggg

- I DON'T MOLEST CHILDREN

have any of the other candidates even talked about this yet?

NO

BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL CHILD MOLESTERS

- i don't believe in god

now, i know what you're thinking

how can we elect an athiest to be the next pope???

well

since i don't believe in god

that means i'm UNBIASED

and it's about time we got all these special interests//lobbyists out of the church!

you hear that "god"???

A D'ESTROYER PAPACY IS NOT FOR SALE

NOT!

FOR!

SALE!

NOT!

FOR!

SALE!

- would abolish church

BOOM

vote d'estroyer for pope

i'm dave d'estroyer and i approve this dave update