hellllllllloooooo

this is dave

man i really need to take a shower tonite

dear loyal readers

please call or text me tonight after 6:30

to remind me to take a shower

510 575 HISS

sometimes i look at the "stats" of the dave update

over 1500 page views and counting thank you very much

mostly due to my thrilling expose of casualmeetup.com

(probably gonna get a bunch more hits now by just mentioning casualmeetup.com)

but when i was looking at stats yesterday

i saw something very odd

there's a section called "search keywords" or something like that

where if someone does a google search for "something"

and one of the results is your site

and they visit your site because of that search

apparently that stuff is tracked?

clearly i'm not 100% informed on this stuff

seriously computers and i just don't understand each other

i decided against making a corny "couples therapy" joke there

you're welcome

anyways

for awhile my search keyword has been limited to sexcbebe5940

casualmeetup.com

casualmeetup.com scam

etc etc

(this post is gonna BLOW UP, btw)

anyways, yesterday i noticed something weird on there

one of my search keywords is

"what happens when your butt hurts"

hahahahahahahaaha

so i googled it

OF COURSE

and sure enough a dave update is like the 9th result

you can't use quotes around it though

so young davers

i have another request for you all

please google what happens when your butt hurts

and click on any result for the dave update

i'd like the dave update to be the first result for a google search on what happens when your butt hurts

this has been THE DAVE UPDATE: Your #1 stop for news on what happens when your butt hurts