oh hey

forgot about you

i'm really bored in life

and lonesome

so i don't know why i turned to the internet for help

but i got on a free dating site

whose name i'm not going to say but you can probably guess

i HATE IT

because it's depressing and stupid

and kind of embarrassing

one r or two?

i always get confused

and above all

it's opposite everything...

well

i feel like maybe i should make a director's cut of this dave update

where i allow myself to go on a rant

but the studio definitely wants to cut that scene

so if i can think of a blog equivalent

to dvd bonus features

i'll add it there

but i mean i'm bored

(obviously)

and lonesome

and frankly don't know what else to do

in the way of

"meeting people"

so don't judge

it's rude

you don't know how other people live

anyways

i'm updating my profile right now

and trying to think of good things to do

that's when i remembered the dave update

because i thought of the best answer to:

"my self-summary"

i went on imdb and looked up don knotts

and copy and pasted the first paragraph of his bio

and replaced the name don knotts with DAVE

i am laughing so hard out loud at myself

tears are literally rolling down my eyes

only like half/sad tears

MAN this is a punctuation heavy dave update

why the slash there?

i don't know it was in my head for some reason

i do *s instead of "s in text messages

but that's just because it's more complicated to do "s

i don't know why i put that there

UGH

i'm getting distracted

anyways

i also put down, for:

"The First Thing people notice about me is:"

ha ha i feel like if i could answer this question i wouldn't be meeting people on the internet

that's not as funny as the don knotts one

it's a little more true

i'm trying to think of better things to put for my interests section

because i put it in serious earlier

but now it seems dorky

i don't know

maybe i'll post a link when i'm done

and you can make fun of me for answering so many dating questions

SHUT UP I'M BORED

this has been a surprisingly circular though potentially incoherent dave update

ps - okcupid.com/profile/xxoxoxcetera